Never Been to Greece!

Uuuh … those Demis Roussos tunes! Since I was a child I used to listen to that soothing voice from Greece and those wonderful sounds from the mandolin strings, it made my heart yearn for a true love story. As I grew up, I became a very dreamy person, and would always dream of the place where my future love story will flourish and blossom. I always pictured myself in a beautiful and simple dress with my hair untied and traveling through the air, with the man of my dreams right beside me.

One day while having a nice breakfast and listening to my Greek old buddy Demis, to his lovely song “Marlene” to be specific, I started dreaming of my story and how it could be in a place like that, and  I just felt like I'd want to have it all. An exotic spot where you lose track of time, a place that includes romance, adventure, fun nights, natural scenery, along with a bit of history. So, I was instantly inspired by the music am listening to and envisioned Greece as the magical place that has it all!

Believing that every place has a story to tell, I don’t have to wonder how beautiful that country is to have inspired such works of art. A huge number of tales with such unique flavors, tales of love and war, statues, temples and carvings of ancient times are all the product of this country’s captivating charm. In a land like that, rich with stories or shall I call them myths, I can’t help but feel like I want to go back in time, be there and live that life. 

I think to myself, why can’t I be Psyche the maiden with which “Cupid” the son of Venus fell in love so deep! The beautiful mortal who was worshiped by the people throughout the land, that they even forgot about Venus the goddess of love and beauty! It makes Venus so angry with jealousy and decides to ruin her. Venus sends her son Cupid or”Eros” to shoot her with an arrow to make her fall in love for the most vile and ugly man, but when he sees her he scratches himself with the arrow and falls for her. Or even Helen of Troy, I would have really loved to be the beautiful woman whose face has launched a thousand ships, and the apparent reason behind the Trojan wars, after Paris stole her from her husband Menelaus the Spartan king, I wish I can go there to get a taste of all that...

What is also very remarkable about Greece is the Greek architectural achievements. They could gracefully blend their wonderful history and the magnificent nature. They built one of their temples, the temple of Aphaia, dedicated to the moon goddess Aphaia, the Minoan goddess of wisdom and light, in a superb location where it overlooks the vast blue Aegean Sea, which is known now as the Island of Aegina, one of the most visited islands for ‘Beach Holidays.’ Even their houses are nicely built on the green mountains that are mostly near to several historic places. It’s a heavenly bond between the past and today.

I dream I’d wake up on the island of Crete to the smell of orchids mixed with the sea breeze, coming from my open window, in a rental villa, rich with warm and tender sunlight on the highest mountain peak on Crete, mount Idha. I’d walk outside to meet my beloved who would be standing on a porch waiting for me while he looks at the sea, green mountains, and the clear blue sky in the view. There we’d plan to use all the sun we can get by the big blue sea, lay back, hold hands and listen to its waves as long as we can. Then we’d take a long walk through a Cretan grape vineyard, talk about everything while enjoying the oriental flavored music and singing of the villagers from a near distance. Suddenly and very clumsily we'd start doing that jolly Zorba dance!!

And at the end of the day, we’d find our way back to the mountain peek as the sun sets. As we stay out till the night comes, changing all the colors into mystery ... filling the sky with zillions of stars at which we’ll gaze upon. We’d make a new plan to spend all of the next day on a boat out in the open sea, with the intention of turning those moments we spend into our future best memories. Then again I’d watch us slow dancing to the sweet melodies from the mandolins and say to myself; I really can’t wait to go there and do it all. So, would you beat me there…?  

June - 2010

Major Magazine

Virtually Attractive

For a long time many people have accused Hollywood of giving the wrong idea about romance or life in general, by setting some patterns for how relationships and life in this world could be, in a very appealing manner. Also video games where thought to have wasted the time and brains of many people. Starting with super Mario who saves the princes and ending with the online games were people get to plant gardens and raise sheep. The fact that they resemble things we see in reality made it easier for many to resort to movies when they couldn’t live their romantic dreams in real life, while those who resorted to video games have found a sense of victory when they win or get high scores. People found that those movies or games satisfy the needs they can’t satisfy in their real lives. They’re all from reality and that is why they attract people, but they are not real!

Now we have a new kind of obsession which in my point of view sums it all in just one big obsession; Internet and the insanely fast growing communication technology, which has turned into an addiction to a large number of people. It’s a kind of addiction that makes it hard for people to even get out of their houses and get normal lives. Online; people can be anything and anybody. They can be rich and famous in a number of games, plant gardens filled with virtual fruits; they could also date beautiful avatars! Or they would spend lots of hours in chat rooms talking to many people they have never met before and all at the same time.

Please don’t get the wrong idea. I’m not saying that meeting people online or communication over the internet is a bad thing. However, I’d like to say that spending too much time on the internet to an extent that makes almost everyone a person knows an online acquaintance is a pretty serious issue. Because then they’d be settling to the virtual life and giving away living in the tangible physical world. I know that some might find online interactions to be more satisfying than real-time ones. But when people seclude themselves in living only this type of life, it means that they give up on their real identities for the sake of being someone else online. Enjoying this for a while could be considered ok, but if it takes a person many years to realize what they’re missing then they have a problem.

Some gain the respect and appreciation they have always looked for online that they decide online is gonna become their lives. They gradually forget all about actual human contact until people become one of their biggest fears. I mean it must be confusing to see actual human facial expressions when all they see is smiley faces...! 

No matter how animate they become I can’t believe they could be enough for anybody. Others would go to the extent of convincing themselves that the problem is with people and just use it as an excuse or a cover up for their lack of effective communication skills or the unwillingness to understand the other. In fact they take it further and push away anybody they think will intrude into their comfort zone, which brings us to the actual reason why they hide behind a screen instead of facing people.

Whatever the reasons are, low self-esteem, fear of miscommunication, fear of getting hurt or physical appearance issues; people better work on the reasons that made them hide in the first place, what made them give away any chance of having people who are made of flesh and blood in their lives. They need to understand that avoiding getting their hearts broken will not stop it from eventually happening, but what they also need to know that it never killed anybody.

Realistically speaking we can’t stop the development or technological evolution because it’s the future. And if technology is so controlling and apparently substitutes the real life for some people then the next step should be finding a way to convert those who like it that much into robots so that they get to really live! And that just seems unrealistic at the time being. So to avoid getting ran over by this madness and getting the real life mixed with the virtual one, people need to draw a line to separate the real life from the virtual. They also need to start thinking of the chances they can have far from the artificial life.

I must say that using the internet to meet people then getting to meet them in real life is nice but to keep it an online relationship is kinda sick! I mean how can a girl ever get a long stare that would freeze her body when all she looks at is a flat screen with a male avatar at the other end?!!! I didn’t forget the invention of web cams nor belittling its efficiency. And although it is the closest thing to a real human contact, in my opinion is not always the best. Some things will always need to be executed the classic way in order to really work. People need to believe that nothing will ever replace the feeling of fresh air filling their lungs or the touch of another human beings hand or a real human hug when they really need one, just nothing!   

June - 2010

Major Magazine

Judge NO More

Sometimes I watch how people give their opinions about others with pure astonishment and deep disappointment. I watch the majority of people while feeding frenzily like a school of piranha fish on other peoples’ mere existence. Without thinking twice or even knowing the truth behind what they see, people just open their fire and ruthlessly criticize and judge others. This could sound like a given or like a line from a sermon, but being judgmental with or without knowing the reasons behind what we see from other people is absolutely beyond us as human beings. However, knowing this, lots of people still give themselves the right to judge others! It kinda takes me back to school days, when I used to be verbally bullied by others, and those are not pleasant memories at ALL.

Everyday I believe more and more that life is just a bigger version of school, and that maturity is just another thing that people pass by, without actually gaining the essence of it. And by maturity I mean the mental development that makes people aware of their actions and the results of their deeds. People still make a big deal out of the little things that matter the least or the things that wouldn’t really matter at all! They still have no problem with being totally inconsiderate and heedless of other people’s feelings or even turning someone’s life into a living hell for the sake of a laugh. It is really pathetic when people judge others just to feel ok about their own lame lives.

To prove my point let me share an incident with you. I used to work in an international company where foreigners work alongside Egyptians. One day a new foreign employee joined one of the teams. This foreign employee happened to be a female. What’s really disappointing is that almost everybody wanted her to leave ever since she came! Before you wonder why, let me just put it this way; she was not blond, she was dark skinned, a bit overweight and didn’t have silky straight hair. I had no idea how could this matter in a work environment, and I never thought that the well educated and cultured people can deal with appearances with such superficiality. Since her first day in the company they made fun of her and snuck comments about her behind her back. They quickly judged her based on her looks ONLY, and nothing else. Not her performance and not her personality. I do not mean all guys when I say this, but apparently as a foreign girl she failed to satisfy the guys’ superficial belief in the pretty foreign blond girl who’d be the object they all wanna hook up with!

              Making fun of somebody’s life WON’T make yours any better!

Judging is not just the things we say about others or what others say about us. It is a bit more than that. And because I think almost everybody does it, I suppose we really need to dig it in order to be able to weigh and measure its impact on ourselves and on others. I found out that it includes some tricks that are almost unfelt if you overlook them. I’ll try to point out some of the things I believe would cause serious consequences but people would probably unconsciously ignore.

Judging yourself based on comparisons to other people

For example, some people would walk into a crowd feeling so good about themselves and how they look, until they see another person who might look better than they do. That’s when their bubble pops and everything turns upside down. I’ve seen beautiful girls who in my point of view shouldn’t even bother wearing make up, acting very strange and insecure about their looks that they squeeze their brains thinking of every single little detail and of what others would think of them or of how they look. Then suddenly and automatically their whole attention shifts to the negative side instead of acknowledging that they’d still look nice even in the presence of a more beautiful person.

Constructive Judgment

Comparing ourselves to others if ever necessary shouldn’t be that devastating, I consider it healthy for a person that would like to develop and foster. However, people need to know that such comparisons shouldn’t control what we think of ourselves. It could be so harsh and extremely unrealistic, because nobody can possibly be the best at anything. There will always be someone who would beat us at the thing we think we do very well. But I can’t see why would anybody let this get out of hand and turn it into a self confidence killer. I really believe that what really matters is that we keep doing our best and never stop trying to be better, because if we keep judging ourselves in such manner, one day we’ll end up actual losers.

“We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done.” Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Letting people’s Judgments scare us

It is a fact and a normal thing that we constantly look for acceptance from others. But sometimes we gain some unpleasant responses. I’ve seen people acting away from their own reality just to blend in with a group of people who might or might not be snobs. Some went so far with it that they even stopped talking about their dreams in front of anyone. All in fear of facing any destructive criticism or being looked down at. As time goes by they start taking this feedback for granted and think of it as real. However, whether the intentions of other people are good or not we should not let them judge what we can become, because they can never see our dreams of what we can become like we do.

Unconsciously Judging

Normally we may have issues with a certain person which could be really annoying. But it really doesn’t give us the right to judge this person. For instance my boss may have yelled at me for some reason. Talking about it with others or explaining why he was wrong to yell at me is fine. But if I get caught up in the moment and call him a mentally retarded pig who lacks reason I’d be making a mistake and I really need to grow up. The same thing goes with judging celebrities as if we really believe they are just images moving on a screen and not human beings made of flesh and blood! NO. Even this thought doesn’t make it ok for us to go on judging them or call them names as some people do. Would it be better if we got to hear the heart breaking story behind what we see or hear about them? Even if there isn’t one, what could possibly be the difference this would make to us?!

“You can waste a long time judging a sinner instead of preventing yourself from becoming one.”

Judge No More!

Seriously! It is considered a sin in every religion I’ve ever heard of. Everybody knows very well that NOBODY is perfect and that we are NOT Gods. Yet we need to descend from the imaginary towers in our heads and get real. We need to STOP biting others because we will be bitten in return. It is a very well known saying that what goes around comes back around. So, isn’t it time for us to start picking what we’d like to get back in return?! Please AVOID stereotyping and NEVER underestimate anyone. And always REMEMBER, people are layers!

“You do not define anyone with your judgment. You only define yourself as someone who needs to judge.” Wayne Dyer

September - 2010
Euphoria Magazine

Who took away my cheese!

I don't know if my theory is right, but I think whenever I start liking something it just stops happening! And that's exactly what happened to one of the things I enjoyed eating; the cheese burst stuffed crust pizza from pizza hut! One day I was at the mall and decided am gonna order my favorite pizza. The guy told me they won't be making it. At first I thought maybe they ran outta cheese but because I really like it I had to ask again what the guy meant. 

To my sadness he told me they will stop making it FOREVER! You may think am exaggerating but it really took me like two minutes to process what he told me while I had this disappointed and shocked look on my face, that people started to pile up around me waiting for me to move away so they can order their pizzas. Now, I think I've learned my lesson, which is; never like anything because they're gonna stop doing it anyways…

The right to be WRONG!

We walk around in this life as big containers. Sometimes we bear flowers and some other times we could bear bombs. Repercussions of our own thrown bombs or flowers could frighten us so much. We'd eventually either choke on all the flowers we never sprinkle out or just suffer a big explosion for holding the bombs in for so long! Whether it's a bunch of roses or a mass destruction missile, what matters is that it is within us and somehow it could let itself out, eventually…

I was once told that a stupid question is the one we never ask out loud; either in fear of looking like fools or just in fear of saying something wrong. I recall it was in a business meeting when I heard that line, and the person sitting beside me whispered to me the words "Is he trying to say we're stupid people who ask no questions?" I believe this person didn't really grasp what the presenter intended to state, and that he felt offended just by a remote insinuation of an insult! What's kinda funny is; that person never really asked any questions during that meeting. Personally, I think all he did is fill himself with negative energy so as to avoid partaking. After the meeting was over, it came to my attention that some people would actually obstruct any chance of making a mistake even by merely asking a question just to preserve a false image of overstated flawlessness.

Now I'm sure most of us must've met someone like that. But the thing about such people is not just that they refrain from asking any question like in such situations to seem as if they know it all when nobody could possibly do. It's that they have this type of baseless arrogance that makes them unable to admit they could ever be wrong! It's the belief that they can't be like everybody else, and that at the end of the day they'll still be just another imperfect human being. Those people would always be uptight and unaccepting to any kind of criticism or feedback unless it's praise. They can never let anybody prove them wrong because they tend to be extremists about how they picture themselves; they're either icons or just losers! There's nothing in between that would keep a balance in case they're ever evidently mistaken.

It would sure be so hard to be around somebody like that. They'd probably either annoy the hell out of the people in their lives or just take it further by letting it affect and may be even end their personal affairs. I mean it can get really serious if a partner for instance keeps making mistakes and never admit they wronged their loved ones. Because, for one to admit they're wrong, it would most likely entail an apology, which apparently is something an "icon" wouldn't stoop to!

So they'd rather make a million lie, change the subject, defend themselves by being offensive, frame it to somebody else, may be even squeeze a couple of tears to gain any sympathy they can get, but never own up to their mistakes. They'd choose to live in denial and end up very lonely people who just ramble on stranded and endure it, instead of coming clean about a slip up. It seems that they dread that kind of honesty because it would threaten to put a fracture in their superhuman yet charade picture.

A person with such a difficulty ought to start weighing the damage brought about to their lives as a result of the mistaken belief of being an impeccable creature. A nice place to start repairing the damage is to honestly try to imagine someone that has never made a mistake in their life. Of course they'd realize it could be so hectic for someone to pretend to be perfect 24/7! That could help them loosen up and think that maybe it is ok for people to make mistakes sometimes. Another thing is to give things their actual size, because the predicament starts when a person just decides to make a big deal out of a minor and unimportant fault.

Also comparing our right and wrong and checking them against those of others every now and then could be practical, since nobody is right or wrong all the way, and maybe our senses only are not always the best judge. Because if we count on them only we might just shatter into a million pieces one day if someone or something could actually prove us wrong! It's as if we build up a mountain of falsehood and just watch it tumble down in a blink of an eye after the tiniest encounter with the truth.

To expect non-stop praise on each and everything we do is to accept being lied to at some point(s) along the way! And that's why a person needs to be surrounded by the type of people who have enough honesty to give constructive feedback no matter what. People should also stop thinking too much of the consequences of every little detail or how would people react because that would basically drive anybody crazy!

I believe everyone has the right to be a fool at times and that we all need to give the stupid and clueless person inside each one of us the chance. Certainly I don't mean to aim at looking stupid or ignorant, but what I'm saying is people should be ready to accept their mistakes or flaws without letting them become a self confidence killer. It is important to let that silly person inside us breath, because at some point that could be the only thing that proves we are loved for who we really are and not just the idyllic person we're killing ourselves to demonstrate.